Your journey to parenthood did not start the way that you wanted, but you have come so far to make your dream come true. It is important to pick the perfect surrogate or egg donor; maybe both! Below are a few suggestions on what questions to ask your potential surrogate or egg donor to make sure she is the right match for you.
Ask a couple follow up questions about them
Asking a couple follow up questions from their profile is a great way to get to know them personally and start to make that connection. From there, you can see if the conversation flows and if you feel that connection. Here is an example for a surrogate: “Do you like living in Texas”. Here is an example for an egg donor: you can ask to confirm the egg donor has a diploma.
How does your family feel about you being a surrogate/egg donor? Are they supportive? If not, how do you feel about that?
Asking this question can give you insight to what stress their family may bring to them. Some surrogates do not have family support, but they do have their significant others support, and have had successful and stress-free journeys. If it is important to you that they have 100% support, make sure you ask this question!
How do you feel about delivering twins?
Are you interested in having twins? Then definitely ask this. Some surrogates cannot imagine being pregnant with twins, and it is always good to be on the same page to make both of your journeys smoothly.
What do you like to do for fun?
Such a light and easy question for both egg donors and surrogates. It is a great way to get to know them and their interests.
Tell me about your child(ren)? Or do you want children?
Another easy question that can help “break the ice” if they have children. Asking what their child likes to eat, play with, etc. will also make them feel connected to you. Most egg donors do not have children yet, but you can ask if they plan to have children, how many, etc. to make it personal.
What are your hopes and dreams that you have?
This question is another good way to get to know them, but also make sure that you all “click”. Having an uncomfortable journey because you do not “click”, makes it stressful when it is supposed to be a joyous experience.
What type of relationship do you want with us?
This is a particularly important question to ask egg donors and surrogates. Egg donors will have on their application if they would like to be an open, semi- open, or anonymous egg donor and that makes it easier for both parties. With surrogates, it is especially important because surrogates can feel like the intended parents are not wanting a relationship with them and that is not the case.
Expressing right away what type of relationship you want with your surrogate or egg donor, will make the entire process more comfortable for all involved.
Being on this journey is exciting and can be a little stressful, too. Picking the right agency to help you start or complete your family, will help your journey go smoothly! At Love & Kindness Surrogacy, we care about your needs, and can calmly and truthfully guide you through the surrogacy process. If you have any questions about the process or you are interested in looking at our surrogates or egg donors, please do not hesitate to reach out to us. Our kind team would be honored to help your dreams come true!